Here we are, the day before mine and my dog’s 1 year anniversary living abroad.

I knew I wanted to write a blog, a heartfelt piece about my experiences and my excitement towards what May 1st means to me, but the words just hadn’t come yet.

You see, it felt as if there was still something that needed to “click in” before I could give my full attention to channeling the right words to express the energy of what this past year has created for me.

Last night, it all completely clicked in as I channeled for a friend and heard the words, “you’re ready. Initiation complete,” in my meditation.

I unlocked the code within that I was seeking, that I was being initiated for.

My entire timeline & paradigm shifted, and I could feel the full alignment, full clarity, and divine wisdom roar through me like a tidal wave.

This year has been a journey of growth, unraveling, heartbreak, and fully coming home to my true self, my true authentic voice, below all of the conditioning, all of the fears and insecurities, below the self doubt and self judgement.

I have come home to a frequency of pure love, knowing, and deep trust in myself and the divine.

I have been rewilded.

You see, the journey of the settling in process of living abroad and letting go of who I thought I was, I felt very much like a ship at sea, part of me anchored still in Canada, and the other part of me anchored in Austria with my pack – my fiance and my dog.

Yet in between, the waters were chaotic, hurricanes of emotion, and then stillness after the storm, bobbing along to the ebbs and flows of gentle waves, to prepare for the next tidal wave that would shake me to my core and strip me further away from what I have been told was normal to unravel me into just myself.

I have retreated so far within myself, in the sacred space provided to me by my fiance who props to him, held space for me with patience and no judgement for whatever version of myself I was going to show up as that day – electric energy & blissful, moody & inward, wanderer or nester, writer or artist, witch or priestess, goddess or an extension of the cosmos, or just prairie born Mary who likes to have backyard fires and sip tea under the stars listening to reggae or country music.

It takes an admirable king to hold space for his queen to be the chaotic evolving amazing divine creature that she is, to allow her to express herself in whatever way she desires that day, and just roll with the waves as they come.

I thank you, JP, from the deepest part of my heart, for providing for me everything I needed this past year, as I know some days were not easy. I am so blessed to have a sacred union with a man embodied in his kingdom.

We have spent many life times together being powerful, sensual, and at home with each other. I am grateful everyday for that tour bus in Cuba that lead me straight to you so that we can spend yet another lifetime together. I wouldn’t be as far as I am today, if it weren’t for you. Thank you.

This year, away from my friends and family, away from my culture, gave me the container required to dive so deep into myself to uncover what was locked and dormant within, to uncover the codes and keys, and to remember my own true power and divinity, and to call back all of my energy, power and wisdom that I had gathered along many timelines and lifetimes.

This year was an initiation to priestesshood.

I shed many identities, many skins, many people, many fears and insecurities, and even though I crumbled apart many times, every time I stood back up, I stood taller. I rose higher.

Through my rewilding process, I have felt nature pulse through me, I have felt earthquakes shake my bones as my feet root down into the earth and I stretch my branches to the sky, I have felt forests breathe through me and the ocean rock me, I have felt mountains ground me and stardust ignite me.

I have felt white light pour down from the sky bringing me to orgasm just by simply sitting on the grass with my hands on my heart, light filling every cell of my being, reminding me how supported and loved I am and how safe it is for me to fully surrender to that.

I have learned many lessons.

I have learned that we are all playing a game of life and that everyone is carrying out their own experience through their own perceptions of what is real, and that another person’s path and experience has nothing to do with your own.

I have learned that by me loving and accepting others in whatever form they show up, even when they don’t always make it easy, that I have given myself permission to fully love and accept myself for how I am, creating the opportunity for those people to do the same.

I have learned compassion and grace, and how to forgive the unforgivable.

I have learned just how easy it is to let go of a belief that is not in alignment with my highest good.

I have learned just how triggering our light and our love can be to some, and we must practice the deepest detached compassion when we are holding space for the resistance of others.

I have learned how to let go layer after layer of victim hood {{allowing the external to affect the internal}} and step up to the throne of cosmic queendom, who declares her power and uses her word to create and shift realities, who knows that in expansion {{internal reality to external reality}} anything is possible, that there are truly infinite possibilities.

I have learned that the words that I speak transmute energy in other’s subconscious, that I am a channeler for the White Light Society and when I show up as a fifth dimensional presence, those in my vicinity ascend to 5D as well, whether they are aware of it or not, and this can be incredible triggering for those that are not ready for such.

I have learned that on our path of evolution and ascension, to lend a helping hand, guidance and words of wisdom to those that are also on a path of ascension and expansion, because where you are a few steps ahead in one area that you can deliver some wisdom on, they are also a few steps ahead of you in another area that they can offer wisdom to you for.

I have learned we are all in this together, healing ourselves, healing humanity and in the end, saving humanity from getting our asses wiped off the Earth which is what we are facing in our lifetime and our children’s lifetime if we don’t snap out of this asleep unaware state.

I have learned our love is our most powerful medicine.

Thank you to everyone who has been there and supported me in this journey of starting a new life in Austria.

To my friends and family back in Canada, who cheered me on, who drove me to the airport, who lent an ear when I needed to vent, or lent a virtual shoulder when I needed to cry, for reminding me that I am still so connected to the wide open prairies through just a Snapchat of the #1 highway or the sunset exploding over the vast harsh dry flat land, and for taking a minute out of your day to update me on something exciting that just happened for you.

Thank you for all of the lessons and initiations to the dear friend who parted ways from me. I will always love you, I forgive you, I want the best for you, and whenever, and if you want to reach out, I will hold space for you.

Thank you to JP’s family and friends on this side of the world who have welcomed me with open and loving arms, making me feel as if I am one of you right from the beginning. I am so honoured to be part of a group who is so loyal, diverse, and wild in all of your own unique ways. It’s been incredible immersing myself in not only the Austrian culture, but mostly the Irish culture with sessions, the craic, a cuppa tea and sarcasm most would find insulting.

Thank you to my pack: JP & Lyla. Lyla for being on this wild journey with me for the past 9 years and being more than willing to hop on a plane with me to start a whole new adventure, for adjusting so well and for loving her new life and her new Dad so fully.

For JP who is my grounding to the material world, otherwise it would be pretty easy for me to completely float away in the cosmos. For all of the laughs, the songs you sing to me, the dances in the kitchen, our adventures that some cannot be repeated, and for the constant support and for believing in me. I am so lucky to have you two.

Thank you to the community of sisters that I have been establishing here in Salzburg {{this includes you Sara even though you’re living in Alberta now <3 }}

You have all made me feel so safe to show up as I am no matter how I am feeling that day, you have all inspired me and taught me so much, and I am so grateful for the unique ways that the Universe brought us together in divine timing. It feels so good to be surrounded & held by powerful wise women on this beautiful journey.

You have all helped me fall in love with Salzburg by sharing with me what you love about this wild mystical place.

Thank you to my spiritual team, my guides, the Divine, and the White Light Society. Thank you for choosing my vessel to work through and the infinite supply of love and abundance.

Initiation complete.

🌑🌘🌗🌖🌕🌔🌓🌒🌑

{{ If you are a woman light worker who desires to bring her gifts and healing to the world and needs support in busting through limiting beliefs, worthiness wounds and self doubt/sabotage to develop the inner reality of a fierce vibrant magnetic woman embodied in her power, playing the quantum keys of life, and allowing the divine mother to work through you with ease, myself and the White Light Society are here to hold space for you as your shift your internal reality to create that big beautiful vision of yours into reality.

If you feel the call, you know what to do.}}

Photo credit: Stephany Stefan